How is it that 4 years have gone by?

As I sit here now and watch my 4 year old boy sleep beside me on the couch I wonder how it is even possible that 4 years have gone by. 4 years since that newborn babe slept in my arms  having been born less than 24 hours before.  Time, in it's wild and mysterious way flies by before we can even write down the moments that mean the most to us. 

Ryan, from the time he could show feeling, has shown love for others.  He is in tune with feelings and emotions and cares for his family in a sweet way.  When I was pregnant with Taylor (this was before Ryan was even two), I was very sick with a cold and off work for a week.  As I would enter a coughing fit, he would run to the kitchen and bring me a spit cup...sorry, that was gross. 

On another particularly windy day, a number of months later, we were at a local convenience store and I was carrying Tay's infant seat and our food.  Ryan was walking nicely beside me and as we got to the car I began to panic, telling Ryan that it was so windy that my skirt might blow.  Without saying another word, he took both hands and held my skirt down for me as I loaded Taylor into the car. 

A few months ago Taylor was sick with a cold and one evening, right before I put her to bed he sat beside her and, stroking her cheek, said, "I love you Taylor.  I really hope you feel better soon." 

Just a few weeks ago, Linshey (or Haitian sponsor child) celebrated a birthday.  A few days later Ryan said - "Mom!  We need to make her a birthday card!"  So he did. It's still sitting on our kitchen counter, waiting for the next team to travel to Jacmel to give it to her. 

I know that all of you moms and dads out there know these feelings of love for a child but I need to put them here....

When he is hurting, I ache. 
When he is happy, I'm ecstatic. 
When he's joyful, I'm overjoyed. 
When he's scared, I'm terrified.
When he's sad, I want to cry.
When he laughs, it's music to my ears.

I'm trying to teach him to love everyone, be kind always and that it's okay to cry or be mad.  I'm trying to remember how important it is for me to be a model for him in the way I live life.  I'm trying to teach him to love Jesus. 

Ryan - your daddy and I are so happy to have you in our lives and don't know what we would ever do without you.  We love you more than you will ever know (but as you like to say, around the world 100 million times). 

Love, Mommy